Murder Boy 7-4-14

So last year i decided to be a bmx bike. Mostly out of nastalgia i had one as a kid and thought it would be rad to have one to cruze around the hood. For a short time it served as way to get my dog some exrcise i would hop on the bike hold his leash and be like get moven dunny! That was probable the most fun thing to do with it cause im 6'2 and 235 pounds. Basically that thing sucked ass if you were trying to get from point a to point b. So after i was forced to give up my dog I would ride it to this bar by my house, it was only two blocks and it still sucked. so one night I got wasted and kind of left it there{locked up mind you} for like three weeks. Any who like three weeks later i was driveing home from work and noticed my bike was gone. I pretty much deserved it but was still bummed. Mostly likely i would never ride or buy another bike i'm just not that stoked on them.
So it's halloween day and i decide to dress up for work at the last minute. I decided to be a cholo. It wasnt a hard costume cause I dress like that all the time anyway with the exception being I wore a bandana down over my eyes it looked mad legit ya heard. So other than makeing must of my patrons really uncomfortable{I don't think most people got that it was a costume} the day was uneventful. So i'm driveing home a little parched and stop at the store about to hop out the whip and what do i see some little ass G ride up on my bike. I wasn't even sure if it was mine or not at frist it had been a minute since i had seen it. So I walk up to it and it's got all this wack fucking homemade gang tags! The only way i knew it was mine is the jackass left one of my stickers on it. I pick up the bike walk in the store and shove it in this little punk mother fuckers face. You stole my bike bitch!!! I screamed this at him as im shoveing my bike in his face. This kid is 17 tops and i forgot i still had the bandanna over my eyes. This Kid is shook!!!! Rember you little buster ain't no such things as half way crooks! So I just grab my bike through it in my whip and bounce. So today I'm rideing the murder boy around thinking would if I run into this young dumb kid who propable dosent give a fuck. Getting punked out never look's good especially if your a little ass G. But now i kind of like the shitty ass gang tags cause to me its funny. jUST THE FACT THAT i GOT MY BIKE BACK IS CRAZY!

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Several months ago dureing my work shift i began watching a show on A&E know as a haunting. If you have ever seen this shit i'm sure you are more than aware that it's terrifing. I don't know if these assholes are in kahotes with the catholic church but it is'nt hurting the cause. To make this portion short that shit has got me scared out of my witts and i havent watched it in atleast two months.

So now i have insomnia like a mug. Even if i have never experincied a super natural event I'm damn sure i will each and every night. So I deal with this by leaving my tv on. I know brillant call I never really fall a sleep and if my joint was haunted nonstop extends info mercials arent going to stop them. And now to my point have you seen this shit? It'd a pill thats supposed to add like 3 inches to your shit! Who dosent want that I don't care if you have a dick that's 2ft long you still want another 3inches. The problem is the add is supposed to be them walking up to random people asking if they know about the product. Somehow every motherfucker not only knows but uses it and they all got some fly ass chick on they arm. If it works you don't need to front like dat! So i can't spell and my writeing is remedel at best say your scrouteny bitch its art na mean!

Dat GodDamn Cat!!!!!!!!

So check this. This is baxter he may look like a sweet kitty cat but he is in disquise! He is actually the world's biggest player hater! Peep game God!

So i snore... i know this, my girl know's this... it's common knowledge. This goddamn cat is a mother fucking hater! So she makes me sleep on this make shift couch so she can sleep and every time i do so this asshole pee's on it! you feel me some shit had to be done!!! It's not like i can just go and kill her cat! I had to take drastic measures god! Peep Game!

I had enough of this player hateing cat! What could i do a mere mortal man vs a player hateing kitty? I was not yet equipted for the task. But i will be!

My first choice was to consult a dear friend. Oh what should i do Oh WISE ragesdale? He offered little to no adive. Believie dat homie!!! All though ragesdale was a wise man most of his life entailed hanging out in front of the feed store with my cousin toothy debating the variouse quality of salt licks. That or something about the middle east. Any who!!!!!

The last image in my mind before i did the only thing a man can do. My sweet melissa! Please forgive my absense! Im not yet strong enough to do what i must! I must find away to combat plater hateing of this magnitue! Perhaps the mysterious east will provide the key?

Seven long years! Seven years of begging at the feet of those who had the knowledge and strenght to give me what i needed! Seven long years of training in the lotus style! sEVEN LONG YEARS! He will pay oh how he will pay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!